A Sad-sad CNY

The first day of CNY was an exciting day for both my husband and i.
Despite that this year is the first year for us to give out ang pow to the 'little ones', we were pretty excited and looking forward to spend our CNY morning with Julian's grandma (or as we called her MaMa) in Damai Specialist Centre.

MaMa was admitted to DNC right after our wedding because her back gave her so much pain and it was unbearable.
Doctor said one of the bone in MaMa's spine had fractured, and that she was malnutrition.
Even so, with proper care, she 'will be ok'.

Who could have known that something bad would happen sooner than we expected.
At midnight, we received a call from my Dad-In-Law that MaMa went to a Comma.
We rushed to SMC and found her in a very weak stage.
She was then transferred to QE the morning after with her life supported by machines and medicines.

It was only a matter of time...

It saddens me because just few hours ago, MaMa was on the phone talking to relatives and greeted them with CNY wishes.
Yes, at 92 years old, her mind was still very sharp.
She even remembered to give us Ang Pow, mind you.
While chatting, we asked her to stay strong and to hold on a little longer; and who knows, if god permits, we'll try to get her a great grandchild for her to play with.
The statement made her happy.

Unfortunately, her body was not kind to her, and that god loves her more.

MaMa passed away right in front of my eyes, at 5.35pm.
I saw her heart rate depleating from 50 to 0.. And suddenly went as high as 90 and back to 0 again.
At that exact moment, I saw her tear went down on her right cheek.

As the young doctor mentioned "Puan Sudah tiada", my husband and I stood there, not knowing what to say, what to do and what to feel.

It happened so fast.

It broke my heart to see my Dad-in-Law talked to her dead body as if she was alive, still trying to put a smile on his face.
Imagine that he stood by her the whole time, and missed her only by 20 minutes when he quickly went home just to grab a bite.

And so, our CNY week passed by with funeral preparations.
All relatives came back from afar, helping and supporting each other emotionally.
MaMa was cremated on Saturday, 3.30pm.

It was my first time experiencing a Christian Chinese funeral.
As a muslim in-law, i couldn't do much, other than helping them to cook and prepare lunch and dinner while they were praying, or standing by at Fook Lu Siew.

Before being cremated, I saw the shawl that I presented to her 3 years ago was included together with her other favorite items to be cremated with her.
She carried it the whole time especially when she was in the hospital.
I couldn't control my emotion ;(

After the whole funeral is done, we had a family lunch.
MaMa's death somehow brought the whole family together, and it was the greatest Lee family lunch i've ever attended, especially with my Mom-in-Law around :)

Thank you MaMa for staying strong, blessed and witnessed our wedding.
Thank you for accepting my tea during the tea ceremony.

Thank you for everything.

We love you dearly.

It's 2012! My world is just beginning ;)

I cannot believe that i dragged and draaaagggggeeeedddd my blog post right until today! *consistency uber failed*
It's now Jan, 2012... and in less than 2 weeks, we shall welcome February!
Ain't time flies by so fast? *gulp*

I am now married =D
I moved to my new yet incomplete apartment <.<
Ash has grown big.. he is now 4 months old ^_^
and I'm excited of what the future holds ;)

I will need some time *yes, slight delay again* to compile all of my wedding photos and videos to share with you on my wedding updates.
I shall separate it into parts, from preparations to the big day itself.

As for our humble home, my darling hubby and I were planning to have a simple house warming during the CNY, but regret to inform that THAT will have to wait too till the apartment is fully completed.
Unfortunately for us, we got a lousy contractor who is so malas tahap gaban.
I think even Gaban is not that malas *grr*
The apartment is so small, and all they have to do is a tiny kitchen and 2 custom furniture.
Yet it took them 5 months and it's still not finished <.<
So imagine us sleeping in a still dusty apartment with a naked wardrobe staring at us, incomplete shoe/utility rack mirror and an open wide washing machine area with no sliding door.
My first dream 'home' wracked; but we're trying to be as optimistic as possible and try not to let it get to us.

Can't wait for deco shopping with Richard this Saturday <3 ^^v
At least THIS will keep me entertained.



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